There are two ways to be in complete oblivion as to what is happening in the world.
One: travel with small kids. It's difficult to keep up-to-date on news when you're trying to keep a small toddler entertained on a flight, and when you collapse into your hotel bed after a day of trekking (in our case in a city over the past three days).
Two: kids' kindergarden and school vacation. I'm currently in this for a week for autumn break, and I can forget sitting down with the newspaper for more than half an article, or spending any real time online, other than to play the Cars movie trailer for the hundredth time (two-minute trailers are a nice length for toddlers, I find - and note that I do NOT play it hundred times consecutively...).
I'm tired. I am happy if I have showered and managed to check my email. I have absolutely no idea what is happening in the world.
Tuesday, October 30, 2012
Friday, October 26, 2012
Berlin Book Idea
As anyone who has been to Berlin knows, the city is an eternal construction site. Especially the central district, Mitte (where we live), is filled with cranes - and drilling noise. Nothing like Shanghai, but for European standards, it's rather hectic. Where our (new) house stands, there was a parking lot for decades. In front of us, an old rather derelict building was torn down a few years ago, and new flats are nearly finished. Behind us, another parking lot has disappeared and a house is being built. The same applies to three houses to our right and left. And this is all pretty much as central as one can get.
Most of Mitte used to be Eastern Germany. After the second world war, during which Berlin was heavily bombed, Eastern Germans did not rebuild many of the bombed houses, but constructed new large housing developments further East. Parking lots took over for decades, and many large buildings, such as the Berlin "Palace"(a massive construction) were blown up. The "death zone", between East and West, was a kilometer-wide zone that ran smack through Mitte (and other districts), and is only now slowly being reconstructed (including a reconstruction of the palace).
I have a 1.5-year old son, and as with many boys (and girls) at this age, anything to do with construction work is the biggest hit. We take hours to cross a block here, because we (have to) look at the cranes, diggers, drilling. It is eye-opening for an adult to take time to focus on how much construction work is actually taking place, and at what speed an area can change.
As I am not quite as excited about cranes and diggers as my sun is, I often stare at what surrounds the construction site. Large graffiti walls, various monuments, my beloved Eastern TV-tower (with a large silver ball at its tip). During these moments, I wish I had my camera there with me, to capture these two worlds. The "construction work below", and the "Berlin sights above". It doesn't hurt that we have been blessed with sunshine here, months on end.
During these moments, the thought of leaving this city that I have so deeply fallen in love with feels difficult.
Most of Mitte used to be Eastern Germany. After the second world war, during which Berlin was heavily bombed, Eastern Germans did not rebuild many of the bombed houses, but constructed new large housing developments further East. Parking lots took over for decades, and many large buildings, such as the Berlin "Palace"(a massive construction) were blown up. The "death zone", between East and West, was a kilometer-wide zone that ran smack through Mitte (and other districts), and is only now slowly being reconstructed (including a reconstruction of the palace).
I have a 1.5-year old son, and as with many boys (and girls) at this age, anything to do with construction work is the biggest hit. We take hours to cross a block here, because we (have to) look at the cranes, diggers, drilling. It is eye-opening for an adult to take time to focus on how much construction work is actually taking place, and at what speed an area can change.
As I am not quite as excited about cranes and diggers as my sun is, I often stare at what surrounds the construction site. Large graffiti walls, various monuments, my beloved Eastern TV-tower (with a large silver ball at its tip). During these moments, I wish I had my camera there with me, to capture these two worlds. The "construction work below", and the "Berlin sights above". It doesn't hurt that we have been blessed with sunshine here, months on end.
During these moments, the thought of leaving this city that I have so deeply fallen in love with feels difficult.
Thursday, October 25, 2012
Hyper-Organizer
Before three small kids joined our life and home, my life was pretty organized. As was our home. I've had to let things slip slightly, because as anyone with kids knows, order is not their highest priority, and unless you want to go mad, it's best to just let be once in a while. I still spend a great deal of time telling the kids to put things back into their places (the girls are pretty good at this, but need prodding), and doing the eternal pile-sorting that moms do (or give up on). I don't like accumulating "stuff", so I feel like I'm constantly giving things away to friends or charity.
The problem with an upcoming move is that I go into "sorting overdrive". It's still a long time off (next summer), but everywhere I look in our home, I see things that need to "go" before we leave. Books, CDs, picture frames, some furniture. I have this mental to-do-list of who may want what, and what needs to be put on ebay or donated. After the last move (1.5 years ago, literally just down the street), I try not to keep paper or electronic to-do-lists anymore. My youngest was 2 months old then, and I had him glued to my breast and a folder of to-do-lists by my side day and night. It was a bit much.
Most people would just pack up and leave, think about it a few weeks before, and say "whatever, let's just sort in the new home, if at all". I admire that ability to relax, ignore to-do-lists, and just be.
Ps Thanks for all who have sent emails and commented on my last post on donating to charity. I saw a great ad for Doctors without Borders, I think that might be this year's destination. 100 million, anyone?
The problem with an upcoming move is that I go into "sorting overdrive". It's still a long time off (next summer), but everywhere I look in our home, I see things that need to "go" before we leave. Books, CDs, picture frames, some furniture. I have this mental to-do-list of who may want what, and what needs to be put on ebay or donated. After the last move (1.5 years ago, literally just down the street), I try not to keep paper or electronic to-do-lists anymore. My youngest was 2 months old then, and I had him glued to my breast and a folder of to-do-lists by my side day and night. It was a bit much.
Most people would just pack up and leave, think about it a few weeks before, and say "whatever, let's just sort in the new home, if at all". I admire that ability to relax, ignore to-do-lists, and just be.
Ps Thanks for all who have sent emails and commented on my last post on donating to charity. I saw a great ad for Doctors without Borders, I think that might be this year's destination. 100 million, anyone?
Wednesday, October 24, 2012
A Good Cause - 100 million by any chance?
Every year, I donate to a charity before Christmas, as many people do. I have tried to get my family to do this instead of buying (always far too many) presents, but have failed. I today read that an individual had donated UsD 100 million to New York's Central Park. There's a billionaires club, of which I think Gates and Buffet are party, trying to encourage others with similiar means to use half of their assets for a worthy cause. It's often more (or entirely) symbolic at my income level, but I find it important to think about those not as priviledged as us, with a practical contribution, at least this one time a year. I'd be happy to receive suggestions for this year's cause. Inspire me with a link or organization to look into. (Apologies for festive season thoughts two months ahead of the time. The UsD 100 million donation just made me think of this.)
Tuesday, October 23, 2012
Bayonets vs Binders, Obama Romney Final Debate
From a shocking first debate (due to Obama's unexpectedly poor performance) to a relieving second debate (which I found rather balanced in terms of the candidate's performance, but at least Obama was back on track), via a entertaining interlude (Biden-Ryan), the third and final debate between Obama and Romney was, well, rather bland. The candidates were clearly tired. The messaging was repetitive (fair enough, it strategically should be). And the topic of foreign policy was, well, as a friend on Facebook posted, dealt with at around Wikipedia level.
I'm a foreign policy person. I studied international relations, and have worked in security studies and international development for most of my career. I know that diplomacy involves subtle, detailed nuances that can make a world (or a war) of a difference. I know that the Middle East is one of the most complex, long-term political, religious and military muddles possible.
But I felt that both candidates radiated a "why on earth do we need to bother" aura on this topic. They both tried to draw a connection to what US voters are likely to vote on - their economy. During the last ten minutes of the (1.5 hour) debate, foreign policy was dropped from the agenda. It felt like they were in their exhaustion trying to make sure that the memorized list of countries to mention would include all the important, relevant, and even exotic ones.
The press focused on Obama's statement about "bayonets and horses", just as after the last debate, they picked up on Romney's "binders full of women". Will these be the statements that the election campaign will be remembered by? Where was the message, where was the mission, where were those ideals?
Maybe I'm also tired after all of these debates. It's time to vote. Here is my symbolic vote for Obama.
I'm a foreign policy person. I studied international relations, and have worked in security studies and international development for most of my career. I know that diplomacy involves subtle, detailed nuances that can make a world (or a war) of a difference. I know that the Middle East is one of the most complex, long-term political, religious and military muddles possible.
But I felt that both candidates radiated a "why on earth do we need to bother" aura on this topic. They both tried to draw a connection to what US voters are likely to vote on - their economy. During the last ten minutes of the (1.5 hour) debate, foreign policy was dropped from the agenda. It felt like they were in their exhaustion trying to make sure that the memorized list of countries to mention would include all the important, relevant, and even exotic ones.
The press focused on Obama's statement about "bayonets and horses", just as after the last debate, they picked up on Romney's "binders full of women". Will these be the statements that the election campaign will be remembered by? Where was the message, where was the mission, where were those ideals?
Maybe I'm also tired after all of these debates. It's time to vote. Here is my symbolic vote for Obama.
Monday, October 22, 2012
Female Factor - The New York Times Analysis
A weekly benefit of my daily (German) newspaper is that I receive a short supplement (in English) from the New York Times. I'm a big fan of the NYT. Unfortunately, the main target group of this supplement appears to be "women", and with "women" I mean those interested in reading about how new fashions come about, how life is as a single woman, how people get married in different countries, etc. Women's magazine stuff, in other words. I'm disappointed each week.
There's nothing wrong with women's magazines if you like them. From one of my earliest posts you may know that I don't. I think I said something along the lines that most of them are, for me, "mind numbing". They encourage too much naval grazing ("I should think about my nail polish color"), or comparing people based on strange factors ("that hairdo was so last season"). Sure, I admit, there's an occasional serious and inspiring article once in a while, and sometimes it's fine to just let your (and my) brain wind down to zero by flipping through 150 pages in five minutes.
In any case, the NYT has a special feature called "Female Factor", which "examines the most recent shifts in women's power...around the world". Exciting stuff, except that we learn about the Ethiopian shoe designer and Berlin vintage fashion blogger. Is it surprising that the latter article then states that "there are no comparable high-profile figures like...Sheryl Sandberg (Facebook)"?
Come on, NYT, there must be some more inspiring, interesting females out there in the world. I can send you a list of a dozen just from among my friends. (They may flip through the occasional women's magazine as well, but oh boy can they do a lot more!).
There's nothing wrong with women's magazines if you like them. From one of my earliest posts you may know that I don't. I think I said something along the lines that most of them are, for me, "mind numbing". They encourage too much naval grazing ("I should think about my nail polish color"), or comparing people based on strange factors ("that hairdo was so last season"). Sure, I admit, there's an occasional serious and inspiring article once in a while, and sometimes it's fine to just let your (and my) brain wind down to zero by flipping through 150 pages in five minutes.
In any case, the NYT has a special feature called "Female Factor", which "examines the most recent shifts in women's power...around the world". Exciting stuff, except that we learn about the Ethiopian shoe designer and Berlin vintage fashion blogger. Is it surprising that the latter article then states that "there are no comparable high-profile figures like...Sheryl Sandberg (Facebook)"?
Come on, NYT, there must be some more inspiring, interesting females out there in the world. I can send you a list of a dozen just from among my friends. (They may flip through the occasional women's magazine as well, but oh boy can they do a lot more!).
Sunday, October 21, 2012
More Kids - More Noise
Having three small kids often means that it gets quite noisy around our house. They're not rowdy (most of the time), but are simply children, and hence make noise. Having friends with many kids over makes things go over some magical threshold for me. I feel like I can't hear my own thoughts. Forget trying to make conversation. What I try to do is to encourage the kids to go and play in the children's room. But anyone who has small kids knows that they won't stay there for long. I'm not a fan of using a video for babysitting, nor constantly pre-organizing "quiet" activities. I believe that especially at home, kids should let their imagination roam - and learn how to deal with "boredom".
But during any larger party that we organize, I at some point reach a point where I wish I could just forget all taboos, common sense and proper behavior and shout: "All kids silent, for an hour at least!" I could imagine less polite phrases here as well.
Kids are wonderful. Friends are wonderful. But lots of kids and lots of friends means a lot of noise (on the part of the kids) and very little conversation (on part of the parents).
My favorite mantra that makes everything find: It's a phase. It's a phase. It's a phase...
But during any larger party that we organize, I at some point reach a point where I wish I could just forget all taboos, common sense and proper behavior and shout: "All kids silent, for an hour at least!" I could imagine less polite phrases here as well.
Kids are wonderful. Friends are wonderful. But lots of kids and lots of friends means a lot of noise (on the part of the kids) and very little conversation (on part of the parents).
My favorite mantra that makes everything find: It's a phase. It's a phase. It's a phase...
Saturday, October 20, 2012
Empathy and Consolation
Dreadful things happen in the world and to people all the time. I have been blessed to have friends and family who are relatively healthy and lucky in life.
A friend of mine a while back sent to me a blog entry from a friend of hers. I do not personally know the author, but she is an incredibly talented and intelligent writer. In the post I was sent, she was trying to come to terms with a friends' loss of twins at a very late stage in pregnancy. To make the chain even longer, in this post, she shared what her father had said about this loss. It was a beautiful text, full of emotion and good sense, and made me (along with probably any other person who read the post) cry.
It's so difficult to console someone who has lost a baby, a relative, or a friend. It's so difficult to find the right words, but not remain silent. I am currently going through this with an aunt who means a lot to me, who is watching her husband suffer from an incurable and probably late-stage cancer.
Sometimes, I am only able to say that these people are in my thoughts, and that I wish all the best for them. It's so insufficient, but I hope that part of my empathy and wish to send energy goes through.
A friend of mine a while back sent to me a blog entry from a friend of hers. I do not personally know the author, but she is an incredibly talented and intelligent writer. In the post I was sent, she was trying to come to terms with a friends' loss of twins at a very late stage in pregnancy. To make the chain even longer, in this post, she shared what her father had said about this loss. It was a beautiful text, full of emotion and good sense, and made me (along with probably any other person who read the post) cry.
It's so difficult to console someone who has lost a baby, a relative, or a friend. It's so difficult to find the right words, but not remain silent. I am currently going through this with an aunt who means a lot to me, who is watching her husband suffer from an incurable and probably late-stage cancer.
Sometimes, I am only able to say that these people are in my thoughts, and that I wish all the best for them. It's so insufficient, but I hope that part of my empathy and wish to send energy goes through.
Friday, October 19, 2012
Having Kids - Dealing with New Fears
Any parent will know that once you become pregnant and have a child, a "fear switch" is activated. There are, of course, different degrees to how strongly a parent feels this fear, but I am sure that for evolutionary reasons, every parent has this. We want our children to be safe, survive, stay healthy, and be balanced, happy people.
Media coverage of child abuse, abductions, etc does not make being a parent easy. Perhaps I have a wild imagination, but at the back of my mind, I always say a prayer for my kids (and all kids, actually) that they get through their childhood (and life) without having to experience any such horrors.
I'm not obsessed with reading gruesome reports on what some children in the world have to go through, but it's often in your face, and I don't want to close my eyes to these horrors either. I cannot imagine how it feels for a child, or a parent, who have experienced horrible ordeals. After every news report in this direction, I pick up my own children, and ask myself how on earth anyone could harm such wonderful little beings.
A prayer to all children in this world, those harmed and those who will hopefully go through childhood safely.
The other side of the coin of fear is immense gratitude.
ps. On a lighter note: as a brief follow-up from yesterday's post on political satire, Obama and Romney tried (and succeeded in) some comedy at a charity dinner last night (http://news.yahoo.com/locked-tight-race-obama-romney-trade-jokes-dinner-031014236--sector.html).
Media coverage of child abuse, abductions, etc does not make being a parent easy. Perhaps I have a wild imagination, but at the back of my mind, I always say a prayer for my kids (and all kids, actually) that they get through their childhood (and life) without having to experience any such horrors.
I'm not obsessed with reading gruesome reports on what some children in the world have to go through, but it's often in your face, and I don't want to close my eyes to these horrors either. I cannot imagine how it feels for a child, or a parent, who have experienced horrible ordeals. After every news report in this direction, I pick up my own children, and ask myself how on earth anyone could harm such wonderful little beings.
A prayer to all children in this world, those harmed and those who will hopefully go through childhood safely.
The other side of the coin of fear is immense gratitude.
ps. On a lighter note: as a brief follow-up from yesterday's post on political satire, Obama and Romney tried (and succeeded in) some comedy at a charity dinner last night (http://news.yahoo.com/locked-tight-race-obama-romney-trade-jokes-dinner-031014236--sector.html).
Thursday, October 18, 2012
Political Comedy
People get their kicks and laughs from the strangest sources. We, both being political scientists, love ending a strenuous day by watching some very silly political satire shows.
Poltico (www.politico.com) has a great daily video summary on the US elections, drawn from the evening's late night shows. It's pretty basic, but these shows all seem to be rather slap-stick.
In Germany, when I used to watch more TV (I stopped 1.5 years ago when we moved flats, and feel much happier this way), we regularly used to watch the Heute Show, which parodies German politics. I felt rather rooted here when I realized I truly found this funny.
Social media and in particular Youtube is full of this stuff. I haven't quite befriended any unedited versions that someone hasn't already sifted through. There's just too much out there that is plain stupid.
Humor is such an important aspect in life. Even in politics.
Poltico (www.politico.com) has a great daily video summary on the US elections, drawn from the evening's late night shows. It's pretty basic, but these shows all seem to be rather slap-stick.
In Germany, when I used to watch more TV (I stopped 1.5 years ago when we moved flats, and feel much happier this way), we regularly used to watch the Heute Show, which parodies German politics. I felt rather rooted here when I realized I truly found this funny.
Social media and in particular Youtube is full of this stuff. I haven't quite befriended any unedited versions that someone hasn't already sifted through. There's just too much out there that is plain stupid.
Humor is such an important aspect in life. Even in politics.
Wednesday, October 17, 2012
Will the Alpha Factor Decide the US Election?
What wonderfully biased questions from the second debate (town hall) for Obama. And cheers where none were allowed (responding to whether Obama had called the Libyan attack terrorism, which Romney kept insisting he didn't, and the moderator in the end stopped dead by saying he did), which shows that the audience was against Romney. Romney was again great, but so was Obama this time around (phew, after last time's rather catastrophic performance). But...
Romney has a clear "message" for the economy: jobs. He's banking on this one to win the election. Romney is also seriously alpha in comparison to Obama. In the first half, he does it in a polite way, though: tough but not insulting, persistent but not aggressive. He may be completely inconsistent compared to his primary statements, but based on these two debates, he is running a great economic sales pitch (whether I personally agree if it what he truly believes or will do is irrelevant).
Obama's economic message is unfortunately confused. On energy, Romney was right to point out that no-one will believe Obama is an oil-coal guy. And his dual strategy pitch with renewables will just anger environmentalists. His mere body-language, unsure whether to sit or stand, whether to attack or remain politely quiet, backfires in comparison to Romney's confidence. On politics, the tables turn. But will politics make the election? I doubt it, not in these times of economic crisis.
I truly and honestly believe that Obama is the better presidential candidate. That he is, with his style, a better leader. Who needs another gung-ho alpha leader in the world? Especially with the policies that Romney favors.
Will the alpha factor decide the election?
Romney has a clear "message" for the economy: jobs. He's banking on this one to win the election. Romney is also seriously alpha in comparison to Obama. In the first half, he does it in a polite way, though: tough but not insulting, persistent but not aggressive. He may be completely inconsistent compared to his primary statements, but based on these two debates, he is running a great economic sales pitch (whether I personally agree if it what he truly believes or will do is irrelevant).
Obama's economic message is unfortunately confused. On energy, Romney was right to point out that no-one will believe Obama is an oil-coal guy. And his dual strategy pitch with renewables will just anger environmentalists. His mere body-language, unsure whether to sit or stand, whether to attack or remain politely quiet, backfires in comparison to Romney's confidence. On politics, the tables turn. But will politics make the election? I doubt it, not in these times of economic crisis.
I truly and honestly believe that Obama is the better presidential candidate. That he is, with his style, a better leader. Who needs another gung-ho alpha leader in the world? Especially with the policies that Romney favors.
Will the alpha factor decide the election?
Tuesday, October 16, 2012
Don't Lie
The principles and values I find most important in life are trust and sincerity. I believe that whatever you do in life, you have to stand up for it. Otherwise, how can anyone know who you are? How can you yourself remember who you are, if you are caught up in a web of lies?
Of course such extreme views need to be qualified. Not all people in the world are safe if they "come out", be it in terms of their sexuality, political views, religion or other. Think of Pakistani 14-year old Malala Yousufzai, who is fighting for her life after being wounded by Taliban for her attempt to publicly stand for what she believes in. And life is not always black and white: one's own views, thoughts and desired may be contradictory, subject to change, or unclear. There may, in other words, be reasons to "lie", be they circumstantial (e.g. threats to safety) or subconscious (one simply isn't aware what is "true").
It requires courage and strength to remain honest in many situations. One can see this with one's children. It doesn't come easy for them to admit to having done something that they know is wrong.
But at the end of the day, I believe that lies are a trap. One gets caught in them sooner or later. Be it in private life, at work, or elsewhere. Is it worth it to take the risk to undermine other people's trust in you? People are forgiving creatures, but trust is a very frail construct. I personally believe that once it breaks, it is very difficult to mend.
Of course such extreme views need to be qualified. Not all people in the world are safe if they "come out", be it in terms of their sexuality, political views, religion or other. Think of Pakistani 14-year old Malala Yousufzai, who is fighting for her life after being wounded by Taliban for her attempt to publicly stand for what she believes in. And life is not always black and white: one's own views, thoughts and desired may be contradictory, subject to change, or unclear. There may, in other words, be reasons to "lie", be they circumstantial (e.g. threats to safety) or subconscious (one simply isn't aware what is "true").
It requires courage and strength to remain honest in many situations. One can see this with one's children. It doesn't come easy for them to admit to having done something that they know is wrong.
But at the end of the day, I believe that lies are a trap. One gets caught in them sooner or later. Be it in private life, at work, or elsewhere. Is it worth it to take the risk to undermine other people's trust in you? People are forgiving creatures, but trust is a very frail construct. I personally believe that once it breaks, it is very difficult to mend.
Monday, October 15, 2012
Impatience
Most things that I want to do, I want to do now, immediately, and preferably five minutes ago. I am an awfully impatient person.
The problem is that the world doesn't often work the way and at the speed I would want it to. My kids don't brush their teeth when I tell them to, but twenty minutes later, and after having been told seventy times. My boss at work would not finish editing my proposal that evening, but after a week. My colleagues in the school association do not immediately respond to simple requests, but, um, never.
I see this phenomenon with my eldest daughter as well. And it is like having a mirror held up to oneself: you are not the centre of the universe. Other people have their own lives, be it games to play, work do to, or things to take care of. Their priorities are not always in line with yours. They may not agree with what you are asking of them, nor may they like the way you are asking.
And so, very little of what I want to get done gets done, if I do not:
1) Just do it all myself. I'm not the best team player, but work better on my own for this reason.
2) Use leverage. This may work with (small) kids and people with whom you have some way to influence their behavior. It's useless with most people.
3) Be strategic. I'm awfully, awfully bad at this one. It's like me and chess. I like just going with my gut feeling (and that is impatient, usually direct, and not always very diplomatic), and not planning thirty steps ahead.
As with chess, I usually lose. Unless it is just me, myself and I. We work at the same pace, have the same expectations, and don't do diplomacy.
The problem is that the world doesn't often work the way and at the speed I would want it to. My kids don't brush their teeth when I tell them to, but twenty minutes later, and after having been told seventy times. My boss at work would not finish editing my proposal that evening, but after a week. My colleagues in the school association do not immediately respond to simple requests, but, um, never.
I see this phenomenon with my eldest daughter as well. And it is like having a mirror held up to oneself: you are not the centre of the universe. Other people have their own lives, be it games to play, work do to, or things to take care of. Their priorities are not always in line with yours. They may not agree with what you are asking of them, nor may they like the way you are asking.
And so, very little of what I want to get done gets done, if I do not:
1) Just do it all myself. I'm not the best team player, but work better on my own for this reason.
2) Use leverage. This may work with (small) kids and people with whom you have some way to influence their behavior. It's useless with most people.
3) Be strategic. I'm awfully, awfully bad at this one. It's like me and chess. I like just going with my gut feeling (and that is impatient, usually direct, and not always very diplomatic), and not planning thirty steps ahead.
As with chess, I usually lose. Unless it is just me, myself and I. We work at the same pace, have the same expectations, and don't do diplomacy.
Sunday, October 14, 2012
Competitiveness and Power Struggles
I had a lovely walk and talk with a friend of mine yesterday. Among other, we discussed why our society is so fragmented and competitive, whereas both of us agreed that people should cooperate and share more...
It really is strange how competitive people can become in the strangest of circumstances. Take my field of work: development. There are thousands of organizations in the field, many competing against each other, and diverting so much energy from working towards the common good, which one would expect them to have as their primary goal. Even within these organizations, there are frequently ruthless power struggles. Information is not shared with the most obvious useful contacts. Backstabbing is common. This happens also in NGOs, or fully voluntary organizations.
I admit that I have been fairly lazy in terms of voluntary work in my life. I was active in a couple of organizations during my university time, but more on the sidelines. I was elected onto a university alumni council twice, which with just even five members was a surprisingly frustrating, divisive experience. I'm now experiencing the same with our school's parents association. In an attempt to work for the common good, and to move things forward (quickly), I'm getting a lot of criticism, and so far, not a single thank you.
What are the motivations of people volunteering for such fora, or working for these organizations, I have often asked myself. And why do I take these things so personally? Like I told my friend yesterday during our walk, I often feel like I am just too naive for these sectors in life. For me it is so obvious that information should be shared, if it is not classified or harmful to share. It is so obvious that everyone can contribute to a common goal, and that one person's contribution does not mean another person's loss in these fields of work.
Why can people not be motivated by oneanother's energy and effort?
It really is strange how competitive people can become in the strangest of circumstances. Take my field of work: development. There are thousands of organizations in the field, many competing against each other, and diverting so much energy from working towards the common good, which one would expect them to have as their primary goal. Even within these organizations, there are frequently ruthless power struggles. Information is not shared with the most obvious useful contacts. Backstabbing is common. This happens also in NGOs, or fully voluntary organizations.
I admit that I have been fairly lazy in terms of voluntary work in my life. I was active in a couple of organizations during my university time, but more on the sidelines. I was elected onto a university alumni council twice, which with just even five members was a surprisingly frustrating, divisive experience. I'm now experiencing the same with our school's parents association. In an attempt to work for the common good, and to move things forward (quickly), I'm getting a lot of criticism, and so far, not a single thank you.
What are the motivations of people volunteering for such fora, or working for these organizations, I have often asked myself. And why do I take these things so personally? Like I told my friend yesterday during our walk, I often feel like I am just too naive for these sectors in life. For me it is so obvious that information should be shared, if it is not classified or harmful to share. It is so obvious that everyone can contribute to a common goal, and that one person's contribution does not mean another person's loss in these fields of work.
Why can people not be motivated by oneanother's energy and effort?
Friday, October 12, 2012
Save Affirmative Action in Education!
The US Supreme Court is currently deciding on the future of affirmative action in America. Most people around the world know about US affirmative action in education, and some (including my fellow students from a university law course) will know about its beginnings in the 1950s with the court case "Brown vs Board of Education". Abigail Fisher, a white Texan who wanted to study in her home state university, recently took the case to court following a rejection, on what she (or her lawyers) argued was a constitutionally unfair result following a university's attempt to fulfill race quotas.
I find this affirmative action case worrying for two reasons. First, take a stroll on Harvard square, as I did last week. 95 % of students are white. 4 % are Asian. There may be one or two black people. I'm sure the statistic is slightly more favorable on paper, but this was my impression. A professor at Harvard told me that the case is even more striking among professors. Out of 200 professors in his school, only one is black. (Very few are women).
Second, I think the case illustrates our current times. Professors and teachers are becoming open about their criticism to the "problems of heterogeneity". Just two days ago, I had to listen to our children's' international school's management sight about "those people who do not understand our language". And they are saying this to me, a foreigner here in Germany!
Does this mean that affirmative action has been a failure? No, it means that university's and school's find loopholes to select their preferred candidates. Was it Yale or Princeton that introduced personal interviews after WWII to ensure that Jewish students are practically banned from selection? It's hypocritical PR to select one black and Asian student to ensure that photo-ops present a "ethnically heterogeneous" student body, and behind their backs bicker about "cultural problem cases".
The root causes of racial inequality in education go much deeper than university admissions. But to give up "up" here at the university level is worrying, especially as the education levels below, with school busing and vouchers and whatnot is an utter mess.
I find this affirmative action case worrying for two reasons. First, take a stroll on Harvard square, as I did last week. 95 % of students are white. 4 % are Asian. There may be one or two black people. I'm sure the statistic is slightly more favorable on paper, but this was my impression. A professor at Harvard told me that the case is even more striking among professors. Out of 200 professors in his school, only one is black. (Very few are women).
Second, I think the case illustrates our current times. Professors and teachers are becoming open about their criticism to the "problems of heterogeneity". Just two days ago, I had to listen to our children's' international school's management sight about "those people who do not understand our language". And they are saying this to me, a foreigner here in Germany!
Does this mean that affirmative action has been a failure? No, it means that university's and school's find loopholes to select their preferred candidates. Was it Yale or Princeton that introduced personal interviews after WWII to ensure that Jewish students are practically banned from selection? It's hypocritical PR to select one black and Asian student to ensure that photo-ops present a "ethnically heterogeneous" student body, and behind their backs bicker about "cultural problem cases".
The root causes of racial inequality in education go much deeper than university admissions. But to give up "up" here at the university level is worrying, especially as the education levels below, with school busing and vouchers and whatnot is an utter mess.
Thursday, October 11, 2012
Applications
Over the past 15 years, I have written dozens of university applications (bachelor, master, PhD) and hundreds of job applications. I have been lucky with some, and unlucky with many more. An accepted application opens new doors, and defines the direction our lives take for the next year or two or more, if one decides to walk through that open door. The door may open to a new country, to a new field of specialization, to new acquaintances and friends. Rejections at first feel like having a door slammed in your face. With age you realize that it's just one door closed (sometimes just for the time being), and many more doors left to knock on.
The funny thing with having kids is that, suddenly, applications for (private) kindergartens and schools come into play, on top of one's own applications. It's sad in a country (Germany) where children's mobility and educational success depends so much on their parent's position, but we have had to sell our own background and (rather) successful careers to get our kids into the schools we want them to be in. We are feeding a system that I wish I could work against, but on the other hand, we want our children to have the best education possible, and believe this does not take place in a normal state school in Berlin (not because of other pupils or their parents, but because of massive shortages in teachers, large classroom sizes, and lack of funds for equipment and facilities). It could, if we would all be willing to invest into education and change the system, but not in time for my kids' education.
I have in past posts mentioned that we have been contemplating a move away from Berlin (mainly for the sake of my career prospects, which are very unfortunately rather limited in this wonderful city). Our main condition was that all three of our kids get a place in a school that we have applied for. The application package (and fee) was impressive, to formulate it positively. We had to submit progress reports for our kids from all of their kindergarden years. Our kids are just 6, 4, and 1! They were all accepted.
We (my family) live in a world of luxury. I wish it could be the case for all children in the world, in particular in terms of their education. I'm glad that there are amazing people working towards this goal, among my friends and elsewhere. Respect.
The funny thing with having kids is that, suddenly, applications for (private) kindergartens and schools come into play, on top of one's own applications. It's sad in a country (Germany) where children's mobility and educational success depends so much on their parent's position, but we have had to sell our own background and (rather) successful careers to get our kids into the schools we want them to be in. We are feeding a system that I wish I could work against, but on the other hand, we want our children to have the best education possible, and believe this does not take place in a normal state school in Berlin (not because of other pupils or their parents, but because of massive shortages in teachers, large classroom sizes, and lack of funds for equipment and facilities). It could, if we would all be willing to invest into education and change the system, but not in time for my kids' education.
I have in past posts mentioned that we have been contemplating a move away from Berlin (mainly for the sake of my career prospects, which are very unfortunately rather limited in this wonderful city). Our main condition was that all three of our kids get a place in a school that we have applied for. The application package (and fee) was impressive, to formulate it positively. We had to submit progress reports for our kids from all of their kindergarden years. Our kids are just 6, 4, and 1! They were all accepted.
We (my family) live in a world of luxury. I wish it could be the case for all children in the world, in particular in terms of their education. I'm glad that there are amazing people working towards this goal, among my friends and elsewhere. Respect.
Wednesday, October 10, 2012
Political Animals
I have three degrees in political science, and therefore also have many friends who have studied with me, or work in this area. But how many are politically active? A few, a dozen maybe. How many are politically interested? 100 percent, I would guess. It's a strange gap, even though I remember sighing at questions such as "so you will become a politician because you study politics?" way back when I started studying.
Maybe it is age, or maybe it because I realize that I actually have opinions on many things that I was not so sure of ten or 15 years back, that I feel like it's time that we all start "doing", and not just "analyzing". I myself definitely fall into the latter category, but am taking first careful steps, realizing that I have the confidence and - moreover - the skills to do so.
This is a call for all of you in particular who have settled somewhere: get active. Whether it be in your school, your local community organizations, or local politics. Or national. Or international. You have so many talents, so much skill. Take a look at some of these fora, and you will realize that you can significantly contribute, and might be far better at organizing processes or getting results than the rest of the group.
In particular to the women out there: find your confidence! Find your voice, say what you want to say. Start somewhere.
Maybe it is age, or maybe it because I realize that I actually have opinions on many things that I was not so sure of ten or 15 years back, that I feel like it's time that we all start "doing", and not just "analyzing". I myself definitely fall into the latter category, but am taking first careful steps, realizing that I have the confidence and - moreover - the skills to do so.
This is a call for all of you in particular who have settled somewhere: get active. Whether it be in your school, your local community organizations, or local politics. Or national. Or international. You have so many talents, so much skill. Take a look at some of these fora, and you will realize that you can significantly contribute, and might be far better at organizing processes or getting results than the rest of the group.
In particular to the women out there: find your confidence! Find your voice, say what you want to say. Start somewhere.
Monday, October 8, 2012
Capturing Memories
I'm back in Berlin after a wonderful trip to the US east coast, where I met many good old friends. Travelling with one toddler ended up being miraculously easy, and driving through the Indian summer folliage was simply breathtaking. I unfortunately took only few photos, as my ancient camera fell apart. What a shame, since I love documenting my life in photos. Ever since I was a child, I have made photo albums. I continue to do so, old style, with paper photos and glue and texts. I make photo albums for all (5) of us. It takes a lot of time, patience and a lot of bookshelf space. But there is nothing that beats looking at old photos. Special ones, not the 800 digital unedited ones. My kids love sitting on the sofa, looking at old baby photos of themsleves. I hope that one day, whenever they settle into their own homes, they will occasionally pull out an album and look at all the badly cut, hastily glued in photos. And this way remeber summers with cousins, baths with siblings, first school days, funny costumes and hair styles. Mommy is very absent in their lives from this perspective, but I hope they will know that I was there, behind the camera. Not everything can or should be seen through a lens, but some memories fade so fast, it is a treasure to have them captured. Just last night, I spent hours catching up with pasting photos (they pile up so fast), and felt so happy seeing so many wonderful people whom I have had the chance to spend time with during this past half year. My favorite ending to a blog: gratitude.
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