Children's Needs Vs. Own Needs

Us parents have a pretty high endurance level. I wonder how many hours I have carried my kids in total, and how many hours of the nights I have spent sitting at their bedsides. We sometimes do rather crazy things in order to get our kids to sleep, or stay asleep. When they're ill or having nightmares, we sacrifice our own rest to make sure they are well. But more often, we battle - especially as the kids get older. Evening play time or bed time (resulting in parent own time). Play time or clean-up time (before going to bed, resulting in as above). Helping time (reading out loud, building train tracks, pushing the swing, a kazillion other) or independent time (again, resulting in own time). It's a fine balance, to achieve being there enough and helping vs ensuring that one doesn't get eaten up and become a slave to commands. Wonderful as it would be, kids' time is not always compatible with own time. Thinking that "I'll have time to rest in 15 years" is, well, not very sustainable, at least I don't manage longer than a day or week with my three small ones. I find it very difficult to just do my things and ignore the kids' needs when they are around. Hence the importance I place on having the evenings for myself (our kids go to bed relatively early), and getting a weekend or two in, at an increasing rate when the kids grow up (they are happy with my husband, with the grandparents, and even at a friends' place). It has taken me a few years, and a few kids, to realize that most parenting manuals are right in pushing parents to take short breaks from active parenting every now and then. A good parent is a generally balanced parent, not a constantly exhausted one.