A / My father has always worked full-time, but being one of the most practically balanced people I know, rarely worked overtime, and never on weekends in my recollections. He was a very active father, spending a lot of time with us playing, doing sports, reading and baking (including the best bread rolls ever!). My mother was mostly a stay-at-home mom, as that's what most moms in Austria were in the 1980s. She ran most of the household, at least in terms of arranging hobbies, playdates, sewing our halloween costumes, cooking and cleaning. Highly educated, she worked part-time for some time when we moved back to Finland, where all women worked, but dropped out of work again later on. We rarely had babysitters to help out, and never had a nanny. My grandparents died when I was very young, and our relatives did not live close by.
Q / In your teens, did you ever have a dream of what your life would be like in terms of career and/or children?
A / I had ambitious dreams for my career, and a clear plan for children. On the latter, I wanted two, and wanted to have children in my mid-20s. When I lived in Finland as a teen, I wanted to become a journalist, a political journalist. At some point, I dreamed of becoming President (Finland at the time had a female candidate, and later a female President). We then moved back to Austria when I was 15, and my mother tongue skills deteriorated. I didn't know where I would have a place in the political system. I shifted towards arts, but although I loved being in the art room, and spent a lot of time doing art at home, I was worried about the creative pressure in doing art as a job.
Q / To what extent have you fulfilled these dreams from above? Do parts still remain a dream but not a reality? Have you acquired new dreams for the years to come?
A / I had my first child with 26, exactly as planned. My second child was born when I was 28, but we ended up wanting a third one. I never tried my luck in journalism, but studied politics. I felt lost with how to implement my knowledge in the area for very many years, and have only recently found what I am interested in doing (improving health in developing countries). I at some point took a break and applied to art school, thinking I at least need to give a shot at what made me so happy as a teen, but I didn't get in. I still dream about doing art, but unfortunately don't do it. I used to dream more. And have more hopes. I still consider myself very naive. Reality is much more challenging that I had expected it to be.
Q / If you work, are you satisfied with what you do? Please explain.
A / I absolutely love the content of my work (health). And I like how it is embedded into a broader picture, which involves politics, development, conflicts, economics..it's a never ending puzzle to comprehend. I learn something new each day, but struggle with implementing my knowledge to have an impact. There's still a long way to go in terms of finding "how I want to do what I do". I'd also like to build up a second career leg with art, in my wild dreams.
Q / If you have children, is life with children how you expected it would be? Please explain.
A / I was absolutely shocked with how strenuous the first weeks and months were in terms of lack of sleep and lack of freedom. My kids were particularly difficult as babies, and clung to my breast 24/7. I was also surprised how isolating it is to be at home with a baby. I never enjoyed mommy-groups, and missed studying or working. I also didn't realize how much debate and struggle there would be. Again, being naive, I thought I would simply be the boss and the kids would happily follow. It's been a good lesson, but I'm still learning to have to give in, to accept different ways, and accept all the chaos and noise that kids bring with them. With the third child, I felt overwhelmed. I for the first time realized that I have to accept a lot of help, if I am to manage the first years healthy and sane. It taught me that I don't need to do everything, I cannot do the jobs of 10 people while being sleep deprived and needed as a mother. More importantly, I learned to take distance from being a mother frequently. Of course I'm always the mom, and always there when needed (e.g. during illnesses), but I learned that I also need my own space, my own inspirations, time, and opportunity to do things that are not child-compatible but making me very happy (such as reading a newspaper in a cafe, or meeting friends for a glass of wine).
Q / Please write a short blurb on whether you work (and if yes, in what field and with what types of working times), whether you have children (and if yes, whether they are in daycare etc), and whether you have any particular hobbies. If you would like, state which country currently live in.
